Table hats and a cape

As of the 20th of April, I am officially a University Graduate. How do I feel? Intellectually superior? Overwhelmed by a sense of accomplishment? Nostalgic for all those brain cells lost over the course of a three-year binge drinking session disguised as a degree? Not particularly. Considering the actual completion of my degree occurred close to 6 months ago, the graduation ceremony came as somewhat delayed and anti-climactic. Instead of a rousing cry of "finally, it's over!!", the event was far more likely to elicit commets of "that's right, I did go to uni, didn't I?" Then we all sit around in a hall thinking to ourselves that we recognise very few of the people we are graduating alongside of. It serves as pretty damning evidence that I wasn't as social as I could have been. Although there is a high likelihood that I met, and probably high-fived, a large number of these people while slightly (and by that I mean very) intoxicated at the pub and simply have no recollection of them.
As for the ceremony itself, it isn't all that exciting. You sit on a plastic chair for 3 and a half hours slowly developing a hernia, as the hat on your head that may or may not have been fashioned out of a coffee table gets increasingly uncomfortable and your arms succumb to exhaustion from politely applauding people you don't recognise. The novelty certainly wears off after a while. And at the end of it, you emerge with a piece of paper, final evidence of what you've known for 6 months - you are a graduate.

This piece of paper has not changed my situation though. As it was put to me, I am in my 'lull', the period where every single aspect in my life has come to a standstill. Where if things were moving any slower I would be going backwards in time. Is this something that happens in every person's life? I don't know, but I'll certainly tell myself it does to prevent some kind of mental breakdown. So for now I am left with no choice but to attempt to live vicariously through the lives of people I know, much like some kind of obsessive stalker. But what's wrong with a little stalking? Well, according to the law, many things, but I choose to ignore that minor detail.

Inappropriately peeing on things in the sky

R.I.P Harley Dog

Sadly we suffered a loss in the household this past week. One of our dogs died. I was going to post a picture but it seems we don't have any of him on this computer, so it made it kind of difficult. I was going to entitle the post something like 'fetching sticks in the sky' or 'shaking paws in the sky', but he didn't actually do any of those things, and as for 'playing dead in the sky'? Well that seemed plain inappropriate. So why not go for something he was far more known for: urinating on things a lot. Thankfully he kept this habit mostly as an outside thing (unlike one of our cats which seems to be convinced my bed a an enormous litter tray), but man could that dog pee. He was a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, about 8 years old. While we aren't entirely sure what he died from, we are pretty certain it's due to him never fully recovering from the affects of a paralysis tick about 6 months ago. He never really ate properly after that, so i'm confindent those microscopic little bastards are to blame. I'd wage war them, but they are difficult to find and I'm not adequately armed. In other words, i need pesticides, stat! O maybe that machine from Honey I Shrunk The Kids so I can shrink myself down and take them on with my bare hands.
But no longer with the foolish little rapscallion of a dog be patting himself of his own accord on my foot as I sit on the couch, or taking over my bed when I'm not looking. I can only hope he went peacefully, and he's now somewhere sexing up Lassie good and proper. Go Harley Dog!

Creeping along the comeback trail

Slowly but surely it's all coming back to me. Give me time and I'll be back.

What am I talking about? Ham? No not ham, what would make you even suggest that? It doesn't even make sense. I think you should really give up on the guessing games. I'm talking about Frolf, what else? I certainly don't have anything else coming my way these days, but those are other stories for other days.

Another frolf game was held over the weekend, and I am proud to say that I fared a little better this time. Again there was only for of us, with Ross being the absent party this week. He claimed he had to go to a wedding, but I have my suspicions that was code for 'trafficking child slaves across the Atlantic', which is fair enough really, it's a time consuming business. Brendan's appearance at the match also put an end to all these kindnapping rumours I've been hearing, which is probably mainly due to the fact that I started them. Now, the scores!

Tim - 66
Scott - 67
Brendan - 69
Hayden - 72

That's right, second place folks! Sure, it may not be first place, but I'll be on top soon don't you worry about that, and might I add that I displayed quite a comeback in the back 9. Magic it was. Hayden purchased himself an Aerobie, so he no longer receives the handicap we were generous enough to afford him last week. Now he only needs to learn to tame his flying ring (interpret that as you wish).

It wasn't meant to end this way

Well, as I know you have all been waiting around in breathless anxiety to hear the results of Saturday's frolf match, here they are. It must be noted that it was only a 4 person game as Brendan was not able to attend, and therefore, did not participate. Why he was not there is not entirely certain, but for now we are all assuming it is due to kidnapping. We are waiting for the ransom note, which we will more than likely ignore. That or place it on our fridge so every once in a while we can wistfully think "what ever happened to Brendan?", then look to the refrigerator at the note hastily compile of letters cut from magazines, chuckle softly to ourselves and go "oh yeah, that's right", then turn back to our game of Uno. Now, frolfing results!:

Tim - 65
Scott - 71
Ross - 72
Hayden - 75 (But with a handicap of 10, his score translates to 65)

As it was Hayden's first game, and he was saddled with inferior equipment (a regular frisbee as opposed to an Aerobie) we offered him the advantage of a 10 shot handicap, which had left him tied for first place at the end of 18 holes. So, as dictated in the rules of frolf (also know as the rules of life), a playoff ensued. Personally I was calling for a duel, and even slapped them with gloves to emphasise it, but my cries fell on deaf ears. So as me and Ross stood and pondered our quite dismal performance, Tim and Hayden replayed the final hole. And in the end, it was Hayden who triumphed. It was quite an impressive display from the newcomer, and has left me fearful of what the future may hold. It's not like I want to break his fingers, but sometimes you're left with no choice.